BASIC INFORMATION FOR NEW HOCKEY PARENTS

This page is not intended to teach you the difference between icing and off sides.  (If you don't already know that, let your daughter have the fun of teaching it to you!  Or visit www.usahockey.com.)  This page is intended to give the new hockey parent a road map to youth hockey and, in particular, girls hockey.

Many of the volunteers responsible for communicating between hockey associations and hockey families have been at this for 20 years or more.  Some of them have forgotten what it is like to know NOTHING about hockey.  When that happens, communication runs at a non-basic level and, in effect, misses the people who need it most.

We'll begin with some information we wish someone had given us in our earliest years as hockey parents, and add some of the questions we've been asked in Girls Spring Hockey.  We welcome your suggestions of information that new hockey parents will find useful.  Send them to manager@spinnakers.org.

Q: Why should I get my daughter involved in ice hockey?
A: Let's begin with a more general question: "Why should I get my child involved with organized team sports?"  First of all, it's an awful lot of fun, both for players and for their parents.  Organized sports make none of the high-minded claims that you might remember from organizations of your youth.  Yet, when properly moderated, sports achieve similar objectives.  A serious young athlete takes pride in her fitness, her mental acuity, and her ability to cooperate with teammates in the attainment of goals.  Her team depends on her being on time, contributing to the team's spirit, and executing the plays.  Team sports reward good judgment, unselfishness, endurance, initiative, courage, etc., and so they promote the development of all those desirable traits in our children.  The benefits last a lifetime.  Many successful business women credit team sports with their ability to collaborate effectively with colleagues.

Q: Okay, but why hockey?
A: At the entry level and throughout most "house" (local intramural) programs, hockey distinguishes itself by giving players equal time.  Yes, instead of giving the better players more playing time and the weaker players less playing time, thereby widening the gap between them, house hockey gives everyone their money's worth.  Indoor hockey is never rained out and, because it has periods of fixed durations, it can't go on and on and on like a bad softball game.  Believe it or not, hockey is a relatively SAFE sport.  Children are well padded from head to toe, the motion is low on impact and (because the slippery connection between skates and ice compares favorably with the connections of cleats to ground and sneakers to floor) wrenching of joints, and most of the rules aim to avoid injury and discourage foul play.  Hockey is extremely popular in our towns, so it is a great way to meet the community.

Q: And why my daughter?
A: When girls ice hockey got off the ground in Stamford, the reaction was mixed.  Most people thought it was great, but some were foaming at the mouth.  "My son's team can't have a fourth practice this week because of a bunch of girls?!"  But the girls have been playing ever since, and anyone who sees them play is convinced that the game was meant for our daughters, and they were meant to play it.  For girls, hockey is a special opportunity to experience the shattering of a glass ceiling.  "You play hockey?  But you're a girl!"  Sounds primitive to us, but it's still out there, and our hockey-playing daughters recognize it for what it is.   

Q: When and where does a child begin?
A: Follow the fun, not the money.  Be wary of advice from those who make a living from the sport.  All local rinks have public skating sessions.  That's the time and place for a child to learn how to stand up on skates and, eventually, move ahead.  If you want to invest in group or private skating lessons, information is available at local rinks.  Local hockey associations run "novice" or "clinic" programs for children who are new to hockey and relatively new to skating.  In Stamford, Coach Milburn's program meets every Saturday during the regular hockey season, October through February.  The children wear full hockey equipment and have occasional scrimmages, but most of the emphasis is on developing basic abilities and keeping it enjoyable.  The best future high school hockey players are the children who spend time, not money, roller-blading and playing with sticks and pucks in their driveways and basements.

Q: Isn't it uncomfortable for girls to be so outnumbered by boys?
A: The youngest players judge each other by their hockey.  If and when it becomes uncomfortable at older ages, it's time to look for an all-girls program.  In the meantime, be aware that USA Hockey has regulations protecting players in these situations, and you should insist that they are observed.  Some volunteers and hockey associations are still in the stone age on these issues.  There is no excuse for any child to be made uncomfortable in a locker room or on a players' bench because of who she is.     

Q: Is it too late for my older daughter to try hockey?
A: Excellent question!  Many girls missed the opportunity to try hockey when they were younger.  We encourage them to learn how to skate and then join us in Girls Spring Hockey, with or without hockey experience.  After a successful spring season, an older girl can play in a summer league, like the one at Terry Conners Rink.  She may then be ready for youth hockey or even a high school team in the following fall and winter.  We have had girls on the Spinnakers high school team who launched their hockey along this route.

Q: How do I register my child to play hockey next winter?
A: Contact the local association's registrar and talk with an experienced and sympathetic parent.  Ask to be put on the registration mailing list or informed of on-line registration procedures and, most importantly, learn the registration schedule, i.e., when to do what.  Ask whether there will be room.  If not, understand the waiting list procedure and the likelihood of an opening.  Because ice time is in high demand, hockey programs have limited capacities.  Graduating members are often replaced by their siblings and cousins.  Sometimes it takes a little persistence for a new family to get in, but it's worth the effort.

Q: What equipment does my child need?
A: Approved helmet with chin strap and face mask, neck guard, pads for shoulders and chest, jersey, elbow pads, gloves, padded pants, shin guards, socks, skates and stick.  Girls programs and mixed checking programs require a non-clear mouth guard.  Fortunately, our local equipment stores are run by interested and knowledgeable people who will tell you what you need and help you stay within your budget.  Most equipment lasts longer than it fits its original owner, so consider borrowing or buying outgrown equipment from friends.

Q: You referred to "youth hockey" above.  Does that have a special meaning?
A: Youth hockey is the term used by USA Hockey for programs open to boys and girls in two-year age brackets known as Mite (U8), Squirt (U10), Peewee (U12), Bantam (U14) and--rare because of the availability of high school hockey--Midget (U16 and U19).  Youth hockey programs include house teams and travel teams.  A house team plays locally with similar teams.  A travel team competes throughout the state.  The strength of a travel team is usually designated A, B or C, so, for example, an association's strongest Peewee travel team would be called Peewee A.  Body-checking and slap shots are prohibited at Mite and Squirt levels.  

Q: How do all-girls teams fit in?
A: USA Hockey has a parallel set of programs called Girls Hockey.  The current brackets are U10, U12, U14, U16 and U19.  Body-checking is not permitted in any game involving an all-girls team.  (That eliminates only one form of physical contact.)  Girls hockey is less populated than youth hockey, so--with the exception of Girls Spring Hockey--it tends to be all-travel.

Q: Which should a girl play, youth hockey or girls hockey?
A: The answer to this question is evolving.  We used to believe a girl should play youth hockey for as long as she can enjoy it.  In some towns, the greater number of players in youth hockey allows everyone to play with and against athletes of similar ability.  As girls hockey grows more popular and more competitive, this reasoning will no longer apply.  It's usually not on the ice or the bench that youth hockey becomes unbearable for a girl, but in the locker room, where the dumbest and loudest players tend to take charge.  When that becomes a problem, come on over to girls hockey, where--in our experience, at least--team spirit and leadership seem to keep the dummies in check.

Q: Aside from Girls Spring Hockey (now replaced by Spring Burst) and the summer league (for seniors) at Terry Conners, what local opportunities exist in girls hockey?
A: Public high schools in Ridgefield, Greenwich, Darien, New Canaan, Trumbull and Fairfield have varsity girls teams competing in FCIAC.  In Stamford, the U19 Spinnakers team operates independently of the school system in order to play a busier schedule and a wider variety of opponents.  Pre-HS players should look into such all-girls travel teams as the new U12 Stamford Spinnakers, Darien Youth Hockey's U14 Icebreakers and Bridgeport's U14 Wizards.  There may also be opportunities at Greenwich Skating Club and New Canaan Winter Club.  Girls in southwestern Connecticut who still have no local hockey opportunities may want to look into the Polar Bears in Northford, the Southern Stars in Milford and the  Stars in Danbury.  We'll be glad to add to this list.

Q: How do all these organizations fit together?
A: USA Hockey is the national organization under which most non-scholastic hockey operates in the U.S.  Connecticut Hockey Conference (CHC) is the Connecticut organization of USA Hockey's largest local associations, although there are many USA Hockey entities in Connecticut, including the Spinnakers, that do not belong to CHC.  USA Hockey also trains and certifies referees and coaches.  When a games' players, coaches and referees are registered members of USA Hockey, we all have some insurance protection.  That is why we take registration seriously.

Q: My child plays on a winter house team.  How do I find out about spring leagues, camps and travel teams?
A: Check the association's web site, if any.  Talk in the stands.  Make your interests known.  Find out what other parents are hearing.  Identify the volunteers who can help you.  Be insistent!  This information should be available to everyone; if it isn't, you have every right to insist.
-  Spring leagues (other than GSH) sometimes accept pre-formed teams, and this tends to make them "by invitation only."  Find out who is doing the inviting and ask them to include your child.  Intelligent coaches want players and parents who are interested; they show up and they improve.  If you have no luck with that, contact the organizer of the spring league and ask if they will have a "pick-up" team, i.e., a team composed of individuals who are not on pre-formed teams.
-  Travel teams usually have tryouts at the beginning of each season.  There's no perfect system, so the fairness varies from place to place and year to year.  A borderline player's chances are significantly improved by attendance of a late summer hockey camp, as well as by personal conditioning.  If a coach notices a player having stronger legs or more energy than he remembers, he is less likely to rely on outdated past impressions.  Avoid wearing under-sized equipment that makes you look less athletic.  Wear an unusual jersey or socks; don't try to look like everybody else.
-  Camp information is available at all local rinks, in such publications as USA Hockey Magazine, and on the Internet.  More valuable than advertising is the opinion of an experienced coach or hockey parent.  Many excellent sleepover camps also send their staffs to our local rinks, where the hockey part of the camp experience can be obtained at a lower cost.  Either way is good, but you should be aware that you have that choice.
Watch out for conflicts of interest.  Some people make their living, or supplement it, through our children's hockey.  Some are great instructors, but don't depend on them for objective consumer advice, and don't adopt their view that "you get what you pay for."  That false notion does an injustice to hockey's excellent volunteers, and to you!  Conditioning doesn't need to cost anything.  Children improve at this sport by spending time shooting pucks, attending public skating and using their rollerblades.  When their practice is limited to what you can arrange and pay for, they're worse off, in spite of your generous intentions.

Q: How can I become a coach or association volunteer?
A: Ask whether the association needs more help.  Some organizations say they want new volunteers, but do very little to make it happen.  Many of us can tell stories about how our early offers seemed to be ignored.  Be persistent.  Make your offer to as many people as possible.  Hockey coaches are required to have training so, if you're in line for a coaching assignment, find out about courses in the fall.  If your local association doesn't tell you, look it up at www.CHCHockey.com or www.usahockey.com. 

Q: How involved and outspoken should parents be when their children are playing?
A: So glad you asked!  As you will see, the spectrum runs from the parent who would rather read a newspaper in the parking lot than watch a child play hockey, to the parent who spends every game, with veins and eyeballs bulging, banging on the glass and screaming at players, referees and coaches.  Find your place somewhere near the middle.  Be supportive and interested, but let the coach give the instructions, let the referees do the officiating and, above all, let your daughter be the hockey player.  In so many other aspects of her life, it's what you think that matters.  When it comes to hockey, listen to what she thinks.  If you want to get more involved in the game, join an adult league.

Q: Have we addressed your questions?  If not, please send a message to manager@spinnakers.org.